No Boundaries
by goldacharmed
Summary: A short one-shot about the full Fullmetal Series and Ed's feelings throughout. Biased on the song, No Boundaries by Adam Lambert.


**No boundaries: **

Edward Elric rolled over in his bed, trying futilely to get comfortable. It wasn't as though the beds in the military dorms was that comfy to begin with, but this was just one of those nights.

It happened more often then he cared to admit, and even though he did his best to hide it from Al, he thought he was starting to catch on. It wasn't that hard to see the heavy bags under his eyes, or the way he kept shuffling his feet, nor the way Edward's eyes dropped shut at every possible moment. Every possible moment, other than when he was trying to actually sleep, or so it seemed to a frustrated Edward, who punched his pillow yet again.

He was just so tired. Tired of chasing what felt like an endless pursuit, tired of telling Alphones, everything was going to be okay, when he himself couldn't believe it. Most importantly, he was tired of running into dead ends, tired of forcing that smile on his face to say, it's okay Al, next time. Then the next time would be as dead as the last.

Still, Edward refused to cry. If his brother couldn't, then he wouldn't, at least not until Al could as well. There were just some days, when it felt like they were fighting a losing battle. And maybe, fate was still too mad at him to give them a brake.

_Seconds hours so many days  
>You know what you want but how long can you wait<br>Every moment lasts forever when you feel you've lost your way  
>What if your chances are already gone<em>

_It broke. _

Ed's mind could not fully grasp the truth. His arm was smashed to pieces.

_I don't want to die_… Edward knew how hard life was. He could have written the book on that, but he still didn't want to die.

The mad man, Scar, He had beaten Edward in a way like never before. He always knew that he was reckless. He always knew he fought a little too much. But he didn't do ANYTHING to this man. He wanted to kill Edward just because of the weight the watch in his pocket carried.

Life was never fair, but this was ridiculous. There were so many times in life were Edward thought he was going to die, but none quite like this. He entertained the concept of death, even nearly welcomed it, but never truly thought it would happen to him. Let alone for just being a state alchemist.

Scar's arm was reaching over to Edward. Fear flooded his heart, paralyzing him. Scar was going to kill him. Edward bowed his head, ashamed at what he was doing. Ashamed at how pathetic he was, living his whole life to lead up to this mess. His arm was now scrap metal, and he was desperately trying to stop his brother ending up the same way.

Scar's arm descended in slow motion toward Edward. That's when Edward realized he didn't just regret the transmutation. He regretted leading his brother on a deadly ineffective, quest. He just couldn't stand seeing Alphones so hopeless; he couldn't leave him that way. Al's never going to forgive me, Edward thought miserably.

_I'm sorry Al_, he sobbed dryly, _I'm so sorry_…

_I started believing that I could be wrong  
>but you give me one good reason<br>to fight and never walk away_

_But were alive_… Edward remembered saying that to his brother after their first incident with Scar. Al had scolded him, reminding him that they lived for each other now. Ed had no right going off and getting himself killed, even if it was for Al. He knew that now.

He also knew, that should a fight ever have the same out come as that one did, he would be ready to give his himself up for Al in a heartbeat. Not that he would ever tell Alphones that. He didn't want to fight with him.

Edward always felt so guilty, he felt almost as if he had no right to ask anything of Al, after all he already took everything from him. Yet, Alphones, never seemed to see it that way. He loved Ed; though Ed would never understand how or why, but it gave him strength.

Edward allowed a smile to cross his face, a rare occurrence. He was glad Al's back was to him, as he was busy helping his brother polish the back of his armor. Once he was done he dried Al off, and turned to face him.

"Ready to go," he asked lightly.

"Yeah, and this time we will beat her"! Al said determinedly.

Edward gave a small chuckle; they said that every time, before walking, somehow willingly, into a sparring match with their teacher.

_Cause here I am still holding on  
>With every step you climb another mountain<br>Every breath is harder to believe  
>You'll make it through the pain<br>Whether the hurricane  
>To get to that one thing<em>

_Ouch, that really hurts…_ Edward clutched his side in pain. He was sitting in the Central hospital, and he had a body guard, leaving him no chance for escape.

He hated sitting still and doing nothing. There was no time for that when there was too much to do. Yet, Edward was sitting here wasting valuable time that could be used to find out more on the philosophers stone.

They were so close, he could feel it. If only that guy, Number Twenty Six, would have known anything more, anything more useful. Edward didn't know how many more false leads he could handle.

He thought of Alphones. Who was always there for him, with him, no matter what. When Edward became a dog of the military, Al didn't have to join him, but he did. Al was always doing things like that for Ed.

He always said, _were all we have left Brother_.

Edward really believed that, but if he could walk away from his old life with just one thing, he would choose his brother all over again. Edward knew to the bottom of his damaged and broken heart, that he would never rest until he gave his brother the life he should have had all along.

_When you think the road is going nowhere  
>Just when you've almost gave up on your dreams<br>Then take it by the hand and show you that you can  
>There are no boundaries<br>There are no boundaries_

_We will get through this _Brother_… _The tables had been turned. Edward was furious, he was distraught, and for what was now becoming horribly familiar, he was feeling crushed by his guilt again. Alphones was trying to be the brave one this time.

_The philosopher's stone, what it was made off_…, Edward slammed a door on his train of thought. He didn't want to go there again; it made him too sick to think about. They spent _years_, wasted so much time, only to come to the biggest road block Edward had ever seen.

This was becoming too much. They found the information they were looking for. The only problem was, it was everything they hoped it wouldn't be. It seemed fate still hated Edward a little too much.

"What are we going to do now?" Edward groaned to his hands, which were currently burying his face. He was speaking rhetorically, not expecting an answer, though Alphones gave him one anyway.

"We keep moving. We find another way. Not after all we've done, we can't give up. We owe it to each other, to ourselves, to Granny, to Winry, even to Colonel Mustang. They all want to see us get our body's back, and so do I. if we have to find another way, then we will."

Edward looked up, surprised by the sheer power of will and faith that his brother possessed. Edward grinned; he knew they were a long way from anywhere. He knew they took a wrong turn and now lost sight of the future. He also knew that at the moment he didn't care.

"Yeah, let's do this Al!"

_I fought to the limit to stand on the edge  
>What if today is as good it gets<br>Don't know where the future's heading  
>Nothings gonna bring me down<em>

_How did I let Al talk me into this… _The Colonel insisted that it had been too long sense Edward was forced to do another mission for him, so of course he just _had_ to pick this one. It was completely humiliating!

Edward walked into the Office labeled,_ Colonel_ _Roy Mustang_, dreading the inevitable. The second he was in the room all the way, he slammed the door shut behind him. There was a bright flashing light and a clicking sound.

"Okay, that's it!" Edward roared. "Who just took that picture?" He demanded.

He glared around at the laughing faces of Roy Mustang, Jean havoc, Heymans Breda, and the only one who was at least _trying_ not to laugh, Riza Hawkeye. Alphones was making odd huffing sounds, and his body was shaking slightly, leaving Ed little doubt that he was laughing too.

It was hard for them to be threatened by Edward at the moment however. Edward was wearing a lovely pink sun dress, complete with matching flowery hat and clip on dangly ear rings. His hair was hanging straight down under the hat, hiding his face as much as possible, which at the moment was covered in make up! If it wasn't for his muscles, it would have been hard to think Edward was anything but the grisliest of girls. The high heels didn't help the image either, although, that was the only part of his get up, that Edward liked.

Through gales of laughter, Roy managed to string out, "Nope, we can't have your metal arm and leg showing like that now, can we? It looks too masculine, and your real arm and leg don't look anything like a girl at all.

Edward smashed his teeth together and clenched his fist.

"Then why the hell am I wearing this dress if you had no intention of me using it!"

Roy blinked, looking confused. "You mean miss your reacti-"

"SMILE!" Interrupted a voice from behind the blood red curtains.

There was another large flash of light. In the second it took for Maes Hughes to come out from hiding like a little kid, Edward's mind flared in rage. He lunged for Hughes, grabbing the camera out of his hands and smashing it on the floor. Before Hughes could react, Edward slammed his hands together, and using alchemy, turned the pieces of the camera into some type of foul smelling liquid.

"Hey, Hughes cried, I had pictures of Elisa on those!"

Then before anyone could say another word, _at least they finally stopped laughing_, Edward stormed out, ruffles flaying behind him.

They heard him scream through the door, I'M DOING THIS MISSHION MY WAY NOW!

_I've jumped every bridge and I've run every line  
>I've risked being saved but I always knew why<br>I always knew why  
>So here I am still holding on<br>_

_How did I let the colonel talk me in to this_, Edward wondered for the hundredth time.

His metal arm held high, blocking the swimming sand from his eyes. The two alchemists walked slowly, lest Al sink into the sand again. Edward plopped down on the soft angry sand.

"Hold up Al, I need a rest." He only said that though, inside he was fuming. This was the world's most pointless mission ever! If you can even call it a mission.

_Look around and find the ruins of the old city of Rickerd_. Mustang's smug voice, repeated words from before, rang out through Edward's head; succeeded in nothing else besides pissing him off even more.

Yes, spend his precious time looking for city in which no one has ever heard of. Ed was sure this place didn't even exist. The Colonel was punishing him for the flight Ed had almost won.

The basterd was too damn stubborn and proud to admit that Ed had beaten him, so he just shoved this fake mission onto him as punishment. Ed wasn't about to say this out loud, ever, but he was finally starting to think twice about messing with the Colonel.

He hated this! He hated being a state alchemist. There was a loud thud, and Edward knew that Alphones had joined him in resting. Though Alphones didn't really need to rest. Thanks to Edward, Al didn't need to do a lot of human things. And here came the thoughts Edward tried, and failed to not think about, every single day.

Almost as if he knew what his brother was holding back, Al asked, "what's on your mind Brother?"

Edward signed deeply. He didn't want to answer Al, but he also didn't want to lie to him.

"Do you really think there are valuable ruins of Rickerd here?" Edward could almost _feel_ his brother looking thoughtful.

"Hmmm, he said slowly. I don't know. But I don't think your being punish the way you do."

Ed gave a questioning gaze at his brother.

"What?" Al said defensively. "You never shut up about it! The whole time you've been doing nothing but muttering about fake cities, and lying-"he paused.

Ed smirked. He loved how innocent his brother was. He was still so reluctant to say words like, basterd. He wished he knew how his brother had held on to any sense of innocents.

Edward always felt like an old man. One who has seen far too many horrors and was ready to sleep without dreams at last. Which was one of the reasons he hated being treated like a little kid so much.

But Al, he was something else. He was wise beyond his years, yet he still acted like a kid sometimes. He was so strong that sometimes it stunted Edward. He was the older brother; he should be the stronger one.

"Come on Brother, let's go, maybe if we kept walking we will reach a new town. And there are always new possibilities of finding information on the stone in a new place."

_Oh Al_, Edward thought, _always the optimist_.

He knew people thought _he _was one too, but it was all a lie. If he didn't pretend to find hope when there was none…well, he didn't want to think about what would happen to Al. Al would have to face being strong enough for them both, and Ed wasn't going to force that on him.

_But then_, said a nagging voice in his head, _isn't Al already strong enough for the both of us_?

They kept walking; Edward deep in his soul sucking thoughts, Al, kind and knowledgeable enough to know Ed needed his space. It wasn't long before they had resumed walking, when Edward suddenly tripped and fell over, flat on his face. He groaned, getting up, and spitting sand out of his mouth.

"What the hell!" He yelled. He looked wildly around, but there was only sand, stretching out vastly as far as the eye could see.

"Brother, look!" Al exclaimed.

Ed followed Al's hollow finger to see a tip of _something_, pointing out of the sand. The brothers shared a hopeful glance, before they both franticly began digging. After getting almost nowhere, Ed slapped himself on his forehead with his flesh hand.

"Damn, he muttered. This desert is making me lose my mind."

He clapped his hands together, and after a brief flash of blue light, the sand around the pointed tip of whatever it was, cleared away instantly. Ed gapped in awe, and he knew Al was too. They were both looking at the ruins of a massive castle like building. In its day, it must have been magical. Even the scattered remains were breathtaking. The shards were made of golden marble, with a stringy silk design.

"See Brother, Mustang wasn't punishing you after all…"

_Every step you climb another mountain  
>Every breath its harder to believe<br>You'll make it through the pain  
>Whether the hurricane<br>To get to that one thing_

_He may not have been lying to me, but he sure left things out_, thought Ed with a grimace.

Scar told Ed all about his emotions behind his alchemy. It was enough to cause a small scale reaction with just the knowledge of alchemy, but the passion, that was where the energy transferred from your soul to your hands. Scar's motivational trigger was not a shallow biased revenge, as Edward had first thought. It was a deep rooted pain of loss. The loss of his people and the loss of his loved ones. Ed could definitely relate to that, but he still hated it. He hated that he needed to know how to think like a killer, hated that he ever needed to just destroy instead of use his powers to create. But Edward had no choice anymore.

_If I don't kill him I'm going to die… actually die_! Ed swallowed his panic and with one swift movement, clapped his hands together, and forced himself to really _feel _like a killer.

What was one more regret on his list anyway? He forced himself to dwell on all the loss in his life instead of his usual trigger. Envy was too slow for Ed. Edward grabbed Envy's face with his flesh hand and with a small cry of rage, Envy's head burst into a waterfall of crimson. Before he could regenerate, Ed did it again, only to Envy's arms, then legs, then head again. Killing and re-killing until the damn thing would stay dead.

_Mom, Nina, Alexander, Hughes_…the list of names went on, forcing Ed's emotions into actions that fuelled his deconstruction. Again and again, until at last, Edward fell to his knees, fighting the same tears he had for years; letting the guilt drown him in a sea of blood.

He couldn't do it. He just _couldn't_ do it anymore. He couldn't stand the flow of guilt from his heart to his hands. There was too much blood there already. From somewhere in the back of Ed's mind, he heard a voice that sounded strangely like Al's, but without the echo. It was a younger, innocent Al, before they had seen Hell. The small voice echoed in Ed's head without permission. Over and over, repeating the lost words to the hopeless.

_Find another way…_

Ed stood up, determined once more. Yes, he could find another way, a plan already forming in his mind.

The last hair on Envy's ugly head had just finished regenerated, complete with a look of murder in the purple eyes. Ed wiped blood off his face with the torn sleeve of his metal hand, and got right back into what he did best. Kicking some homunculus ass!

_When you think the road is going nowhere  
>Just when you've almost gave up on your dreams<br>Then take it by the hand and show you that you can  
><em>

"Oww, ow, ow, ow, owwwww," Ed moaned. He was lying on his back, arm and leg askew, and a determined glint in his eyes.

"Shut up, I didn't even touch you yet," Winry snapped.

She was holding the new arm she just finished constructing for him, a few inched away from his port. Ed glared at her. He tried not to mean it too much. It was so much easier said than done.

He sighed inwardly. He couldn't wait to get his arm and leg back, but only if he first got Al back to normal.

He wasn't upset about being second, hardly. What bothered him was always being the strong one. He had no right to complain about something as small as pain, when Al couldn't even feel physical pain! But the emotional pain Al went through each day, was more than ten arms being connected at the same time.

Winry never seemed too truly appreciate just how _painful _connecting the metal to flesh really was. Sometimes Ed wondered if his lack of screaming madly had made her somehow think it hurt him less. Which was NOT the case. Trying so hard not to scream was such a hard job, that it actually almost took Ed's mind of the pain.

Winry believed that his pride held enough power to contain his yells, but Ed doubted even the homunculus named Pride could have enough of it for this. Edward wanted everyone to believe he was too proud and stubborn to make a sound. It was so much easier that way.

"It only hurts for a second anyway." Her tone had softened considerably, but sentences like that strengthened Ed's theories about her ignorance.

_It may only be for a few seconds, but it always feels much longer…_

Ed faintly heard Granny counting down from three…

He clenched his teeth

"Two…"

His fingers were so tight on the beds edges, he feared they'd come off

"One…"

He slammed his mouth shut, and pressed his eyes so tightly he saw white lights popping under his eye lids.

Winry connected his arm, while Granny got his leg. Ed fought with full strength; he forced his full will and intensity on his brother's pain. His brother couldn't hear him screaming…he just…couldn't…

He managed it again. He never could figure out how he didn't scream his throat raw. Each time he thought, surely this time I won't be able to take it. But time and again, he would.

He panted heavily, feeling the pain throbbing, but dying down in intensity. He closed his eyes for a moment, less tightly. He wasn't allowed to scream but he was allowed to dream…

_You can go higher  
>You can go deeper<br>There are no boundaries  
>Above and beneath you<br>Break every rule cause  
>There's nothing between you and your dreams<em>

This must be a dream. Edward's mind was having immense trouble processing what his eyes were telling him. He was bending, flexing, waving his new fingers in front of his face in disbelief.

_And Al…_ Edward's heart has never felt lighter when he saw his brother take his first breath in years! He was in much better shape than Al though. They were in the hospital now, laying on separate beds, but still right next to each other, like they always were, like they always would be.

Al was marveling at every touch, every taste, and every smell. Each time Al reacted to a new sensation, Ed's heart was gripped with such a fierce pain and pleasure combination; he nearly kept breaking out in tears.

He couldn't believe that they had really done it. There was always the buried seed of doubt in his mind that grew into a hideous plant. Blocking him from true hope and faith. But now, nothing could stop them. They had done the impossible over and over, and most of all, they. we're. alive!

Edward knew he was going to be in a state of blissful disbelief for a while. Only one thing actually registered in his beaded, exhausted, thrilled mind.

He turned to his brother's bed to see his laying down with his head turned to Ed, deep in similar swimming thoughts. Ed put on a true, bright grin, the deepest he had felt in nearly ten years and said,

"Al, there really are no boundaries."

_Every step you climb another mountain  
>Every breath is harder to believe<em>

_You'll make it through the pain  
>Whether the hurricane<br>There are no boundaries  
>There are no boundaries<br>There are no boundaries  
>There are no boundaries<br>There are no boundaries…._

The end.

A/N

No, I am still here and alive for those of you reading any of my other stories. I have not given up, I just really under estimated how much time college takes up. I have labeled myself officially too active to write fan fiction, but I am sorry to you readers, because the very rare times I can, I want to write, even though it's not fair to you. Also, anyone reading, Kidnapped, I am almost done the last chapter. I will try to have it up a.s.a.p. Anyway, Flames will be shot at the homunculi.

Anyway, about the story, I heard the song and I thought, wow this sounds like it was made for Ed and Al. It's also the first song fic I have made that wasn't from one of my own dumb songs.

So I hope you enjoyed it. And most of all, thanks for reading!


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